It’s Sonny Jim’s birthday next week… but he’s made a bit of an early start on the terrible twos.

The tantrums and the oh-so-dramatic tears would actually be pretty funny if, a) they weren’t so loud and b) it wasn’t my child doing it.

I know I’m not the only mama who is trying to navigate their way through their days without triggering a scene that would leave the Hunk looking like a calm and rational being.

So, in the spirit of solidarity, here are some of the reasons my child has cried this week…

• • The washing machine stopped
  • I wouldn’t turn the street lights on
  • I gave him his lunch (he wanted his lunch)
  • I didn’t let him stand in dog poo
  • The washing basket didn’t fit in the washing machine

• I gave him a green spoon. Not the blue spoon.
• The dog walked past him.
• I broke his biscuit in half
• I gave him a biscuit that wasn’t broken in half
• Someone ate the whole bag of crisps (it was him)
• I wouldn’t put his two-sizes -too-small shoes on him
• I shut the curtains
• His sock came off (he took it off)
• I put an empty cereal box in the bin
• I went to the loo
• He sneezed
• The lady in the shop said hello
• A raindrop landed on his hand
• The oven ate his dinner

PS If you were in Irma’s, Leigh, the other afternoon when Sonny Jim decided highchairs were some kind of torture device and that I was clearly trying to poison him with the super tasty bambino pizza I do apologise. And I’d also like to add it was his idea to eat nothing but a slice of dry white bread for supper… not mine!